"FORCED RHYME"

  • Robert Gardiner
    12 years ago

    What is Forced Rhyme.

    I heard people talk about forced rhyme alot, so I decided to research what qualifies a 'forced rhyme' exactly.

    "Forced rhyme". This is a big no-no for formal poetry writers everywhere. Forced rhyme can be found in amateur poetry everywhere you look. Its presence is so pervasive that poetry markets specifically mention 'forced rhyme' as one of the criteria for manuscript rejection. In a nutshell, forced rhyme occurs when the writer is so desperate for a rhyming word that he or she convolutes the entire structure of the poem to make a 'proper' fit. This is often referred to in professional circles as 'Moon/June/Spoon' poetry. An amateur poet may not even realize that he or she is guilty of this practice. But any poet who has critiquing experience will spot forced rhyme immediately. Here's an example of forced rhyme, with all due apologies:

    I hoped that she was heaven-sent,

    For me I found my heart's cement.

    I hope you have the same reaction I did when I wrote that phrase. Of all the words that would have fit the mood of the first line, why would I choose the word 'cement'? Because I didn't spend the time to choose a more appropriate end rhyme. The second line had to be inverted in order to fit the rhyme and rhythmic structure. This is why it is called 'forced' rhyme. All that force is used to make a round word fit into a square line, and it still sounds ridiculous and trite. If you receive this sort of criticism, spend some time reading good formal poetry to see how the established poets would have handled the phrasing problem. Consider what underlying sentiment you are trying to express in rhyme and find more appropriate words that will work. Consult a 'rhyming dictionary' if you cannot think of any other way to phrase your lines. Forced rhyme is not a crime, but takes some time to be sublime. You get the idea.

    http://www.essortment.com/interpret-five-common-criticisms-poetry-64008.html

    We consider a rhyme to be forced:
    1when the arrangement of words is twisted around to put a rhyming word at the end of a line when it would normally be in the middle of the line somewhere,
    2.when a person extends a line beyond reason to put a rhyming word at the end of the line,
    3.when a person uses a tone inappropriate for their poem to get a rhyming word,
    4.when a person inserts a line that doesn't really go anywhere or mean anything to get a rhyme for another line, etc.

    For instance:

    1. I love you more every day that I live.
    If you were in trouble, my life I would give.

    This is not normal speech. Normally we would say 'I would give my life if you were in trouble.'

    2. I rode out to Texas on a palomino horse,
    With a promise on my lips that I would bring law to this town, even by force.

    Whoa! Check out the length of that second line! It's a mile long!

    3. He jerked the bloody hook into the cow,
    and said, "I would not want to be thou."

    The violent aggressiveness of jerking a hook into a cow, meant to shock the reader, doesn't really agree with using archaic language like 'thou'. There wasn't much of an animal rights movement in the Middle Ages . Maybe a movement for people' rights to have enough animals to eat...

    4. Cradle the razor like a baby to your arms,
    Nurture the wounds as flocks upon your farm.
    *Coffee-crotch burn litigation is absurd.
    Let blood replace your tangled, jangled nerves.

    *the offending line. What does McDonalds' lawsuits have to do with cutting, or the cathartic effect of such poetry?

    Here's another case:

    5.Rhyming a stressed syllable with a non-stress syllable can cause a forced rhyme:

    I rhyme so much, I start to sneeze;
    and from my nose I blow cookies!

    The 'ies' in cookies is a non-stress syllable, while the 'eeze' in sneeze is a stress syllable. When you say it out loud, the rhyme is kind of awkward.

    http://allpoetry.com/column/7523857-What_is_Forced_Rhyming__-by-Mephitic_ID_Synergy

    Now, in my opinion a "FORCED RHYME" is a rhyme or line that just doesn't work with the poem. I have no problem with flipping a line, rearranging the structue there of. In fact, that was just part of my writing/english college placement test. The task was to pick the best rearranged line (sentence) to the original, having it still keeping the essence and meaning of the sentence, and be grammatically proper. So, if you can do it eloquently, rearranging a line to make your poem work, I consicer a skill, but the key is "doing it eloquently". I base my rhyming and writing on how well it works 'Auditorily' - when you hear it. If it works, I'll go with it, if it doesn't I won't. A profient rhymer can put rhymes together that the average person could not conceptually put together, nor see working, but once they've heard it, they go that was really well played. Bad rhymers rhymes just sound awkward or sophmoric.

    What is a "forced rhyme' to you, what a some of your examples?

  • Michael D Nalley
    12 years ago

    Beans are good for the heart

    Fee-fi-fo-fum
    some rhymes are dumb
    Jack grew a big bean stalk
    where giants talk that talk
    Hickory dickory dock
    can''t nurse lines round the clock
    Ring a Ring o' Roses
    the issue it posses
    like the black death
    with the last breath
    shallow rhymes
    of earlier times

  • Paul Gondwe
    12 years ago

    Thanks for sharing this, some of my old poems had forced ryhmes but i edited them all after reading this post

  • ronel mccarthy
    12 years ago

    Thank you for that information

  • Paul Gondwe
    12 years ago

    In that far distance place,
    you remain
    Whether in snow or rain,
    i will rush in a quick pace
    Just to see your pretty face

    This is an example of a forced ryhme i found on one of my poems. Though your info might be true, i find it that some elements of forced ryhme must be there to make the poem better.

  • ddavidd
    12 years ago

    Nothing good ever comes out of forcing

  • ddavidd
    12 years ago

    I am so glad we had this conversation. :)

  • Decayed
    12 years ago

    Thanks for sharing, Robert.
    That is really helpful.
    I used to be very fond of rhymed poetry, and I wrote so many rhyming poems, forced and unforced. Now, I definitely prefer subtle rhymes which are 100% unforced, scattered here and there in free verses. Rhymed poetry is very hard to pen.

  • Mello193
    12 years ago

    I guess im guilty of forcing it. but how do i get better

  • Decayed
    12 years ago

    Definitely by reading poetry!!!

  • Xanthe
    12 years ago

    I agree. Reading and absorbing ideas can make you better. When I write rhymed poems, it takes days. But what's important is word choice and syllable count..at least that's what I do.

  • Mello193
    12 years ago

    I don't really like doing the syllable count. sometimes i follow it but others i don't. i feel like my latest works are such great evolution from when i started, is there like a real guide and if so where is it

  • Xanthe
    12 years ago

    I think all guides are 'real' Did you find one that's fake? lol..

    But an 'official' guide, i don't know if there's one. A lot of what I've read says the pattern also counts.. If you start with a-a-b-b//c-c-d-d you should continue and end with that too. If you start with alternating rhymes, you should end with that too.. With what I've read of your works, mello, your poems don't follow patterns as well. I don't usually follow patterns at most.

    I think different poets have different techniques when writing rhymed or non-rhymed poems. But, I can give you an advice. If you really want your poems to rhyme, just write in free verse first, with subtle rhymes. Once you're finished, all there is to do is edit, edit, edit. Most of my rhymed poems start in free verse. And after a lot of editing, they become rhymed.

    Rhymes and ideas/concepts don't usually go along. Sometimes, you have this idea, but there's no rhythm. If you want a more emotional piece, I suggest you write in free form. Rhymed poetry usually ends up emotionless. But you can always mix those two..

    Well, I hope that helps..

  • Amy
    11 years ago

    Thank you for explaining this... I had no idea that, that was the case in a FORCED RHYME... I most of the time force my poems so I will edit it. Thanks again

  • Something Diabolical
    11 years ago

    Most of my poems rhyme.. but i try not to force them... my earlier works you can tell are

    glad i have a definition and guidelines now haha

    thanks!

  • Omar
    11 years ago

    I'm not going to lie. I force rhyme. But i think my poems come out good.