We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don't know.

Vision is the true creative rhythm.

Much like Apple products, I also, am only compatible with myself.

Lesson learned: toddlers don't understand sarcasm. As a side note, don't say 'bite me' around toddlers that don't understand sarcasm.

I saw a Facebook ad for burial plots and I thought, that's the last thing I need.

"This is the ride that killed Jimmy." - me in line, loudly, at amusement parks

Relationship status : Taken (for granted)

Wow, I've been on the No Sugar Diet for one day and have already lost ... my will to live.

Have you ever been so broke you tempted to ask god if you can have the refund for the payment made by Jesus on the cross for your sin??

This girl tweeted at me to DM her. What a weirdo, how am I supposed to Dungeon Master her?