Losing your virginity is a lot like Fable II: It starts off strange, but it gets easier real fast. Before you know it, it's over! And then you can do what ever the hell you want.

Guy: my dad loves his bike more than me
guy2: thats not true
guy: he wrote it on my birthday card

A good friend will bail you out of jail..
A best friend will turn to you and say.."let's do it again"

I don't walk into things, they are drawn to my amazingness!

Girls say its not the size of the boat that counts, its the motion in the ocean... Well its pretty f**kin hard to get to England in a row boat.

Has already met Mr Player, Mr Bullshiter, Mr f**kabout, Mr Jealous, Mr Slag, Mr 'Issue', Mr Stress, Mr 'I think with my knob' so is Mr Right next? Doubt it

Thinks procrastination is a lot like masturbation... At first it seems like a really fun idea, but in the end you realize that you're just f**king yourself

"say hello to my little friend."

"I'd rather not..."

I'm smiling because you're my sister..
I'm laughing because theirs nothing you can do about it >:P

I didn't trip, I was just testing gravity.
...It still works