Internet Dating......The Odds are good but the Goods are odd

As a kid if a boy liked a girl he'd poke her, call her dirty names & pull hair until she cried. Odd, as an adult girls beg guys to do that.

If your bf/gf is mad at you put a cape on them and say, "Now you're super mad!" If they laugh marry them.

Never let someone with the significance of a speed bump become a roadblock in your life.

Unless you're looking to seriously emotionally damage someone, don't ask me for relationship advice or how to dance.

Fcuk you alarm clock, I have dreams!

"Wow, this relationship is really rocky. I bet a wedding and baby will solve everything!" -Idiots.

Any psycho girls wanna hang out? Just text me like 5000 times and let me know.

"Don't let a hot date turn into a due date."--my father's actual sex talk with me when I was 13.

Through the trailer park,pink & blue curlers,red polish toes 'tween cotton balls,wax legs & my lip. Good I's at Bea's. Spied you hook up the trailer & go out of my life. Took that first turn too fast. What's that called again? A jackknife?