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All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand |
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Why do we park in driveways |
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Drive carefully, 90% of people are accidents. |
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People who say "no news is bad news" clearly don't watch the same news as me. |
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If the air in the environment is polluted why do we go outside to get "fresh air"? |
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Guns don't kill people... |
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Bumper sticker: I may drive slow, but I'm still ahead of you |
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People always ask me, "Where were you when Kennedy was shot?" Well, I don't have an alibi. |
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I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson. |
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A friend will bail you out of the jail, |