Excellent!

I liked it, It was clear and very attractive piece. It was simple though but you had describe it very well. It was an awesome piece, you had put such emotions and the message on it is great!

Favorite lines

They are so fake; sometimes I want to laugh at them
But then I realize: I hate it, but I act just the same
I need fresh air to prove this hypocrisy is so lame.

-it really caught my eyes, I love the contradiction part. Such a powerful lines.

The only thing that needs to replace is the last lines, even though it rhymes, but I think its just not powerful like the other lines. But its just me.

Keep it up
Veamm.

Wonderful thought... and brilliantly written...

"I've opened the window and the fresh air comes in
Cool breeze runs slowly down my skin
I wish I could do the same to the world I live in"

^^ I loved the imagery here... truly we need a fresh breeze to remove all the negative things from our world...

and the last part is wonderful.. I liked it...

keep writing such beautiful thoughts dear...