Alittle bit of everything

I've begun to learn,
to live with who I am
An adult lost,
in a young teens mind
I've battled the demons,
but only won once or twice
I've took the blade,
across these pale wrists
And watched as the blood seeped out

I dwell upon my nightmare of a past
Lost my entire childhood,
I became an adult by the age of 8,
And everyday is a struggle
Wish in ways I could face the people in my past,
let out all that I feel inside to them,
I wonder today if you ever gave a damn?
I wonder if you feel bad for what you did?
Maybe I'll never know, I guess I'm fine with that

With every drug I've taken,
I wonder how I'll be in 15 years,
Will I be down in the gutter?
Or living a normal life?
Or strung out on crack cocaine
No one will know,neither will I
But I'm fine with that,I'd rather not know
People give the speech to me every time they see me,
But I've heard it so many times, just quite already
If I really gave a damn what you thought,I think I'd tell you

Dear old crack pipe,why don't you get me high tonight
No Yes Maybe So
Guess we'll never know
Crystal why don't you eat away my teeth some more,
in 30 years they'll be gone anyways
Psychopath, Split personality,tweaks & headaches
But does anyone see, no there all blind

Turn up the bass
Fall into the beat
Feel the emotion
Drown in the music
Oh I'm high, and I'm falling fast
Please don't let me hit my ass

(c) Maddy