I think you have a good idea, but I think you ended it a little suddenly, maybe add another stanza where she finds something? It need something to tie itself together. I also didn't care for the flow. The first stanza is a lot shorter than the others. Overall, I think you have a very solid idea, but you need to tie it together better.

You lost me there at the end. I think some parts seemed forced to me and the language you use was too simple in my opinion. You could have taken this topic into so many levels and truly told a heartbreaking story but this was just okay. I think you could add some more emotion to it. It was a good read but would be better with some more depth. *4/5*

I think this is a very blunt poem, in a good way, if you get me. It doesn't try to cover the reality of what's happened to this person, it tells the truth and for me this poem shows emotion for it. I wouldn't say I like it personally, but it is a good poem. 4/5

This is so sad because you know it's true for many out there, good job

You could definatly feel the sadness in this poem that this girl had no money, no job, ect. ect. and how sad that was. But, I must say you really overused the words she and she'll. I know you were just trying to make a point, state things, and move on with the poem.. but I think you used them like every line.. which didn't really make the poem have a nice flow. But, I thought you did a good job on this, but maybe with less words like she and she'll you would have a masterpiece. 4/5.