Life Of Me

Every day is a struggle in the life of myself
I go through out this day like everybody else
But there are more struggles, heartaches and fears
More yelling and fighting, thousands of tears

My father's an alcoholic, all he wants to do is fight
My mother is in denial and thinks everything's alright
I'm trying not to relapse and remain razorblade free
But it's oh so hard in this life of "me"

"Best friends" stabbed me in the back before I could turn around
And right when I stand back up, I'm knocked to the ground
I always try my hardest to be perfect in everything I do
But that's never good enough for anybody, I always lose

The razorblades are calling me, my skin longs for the blade
I now I don't need to do it but it's so hard to restrain
I need to feel that rush, that sense of my own power
I have to fight this urge to cut, hour after hour

My boyfriend doesn't know what he wants, leaving me confused
He always leaves me hurt and crying, my heart has been abused
I don't know if he's sincere or if he's just good at lying
Either way I know that part of me is dying

Every day is a struggle in the life of myself
I go through out this day like everybody else
Fighting parents and trying to stay razorblade free
It's just another day in the life of me

-Copyright-Amber Palmer