There lies a girl wanting to be cared for
Stares at the blackness and terrified to hear her fathers call
She use to pray to a God
A God she never knew
She showed her bruises and scars, she once was frightened to prove
Now buried deep down in her soul she screamed asking “Why”
A world full of stars and gloom gave no reply
She didn’t have the strength to even try
She tried to hide all her cries
She spent too many years asking herself why
All she wanted was a future to look forward to and someone by her side
Her heart is hurt, everyone keeps silent as she walks by
She tries to free her mind, but all she can think of is suicide
Glancing at her trembling hands she fears she might die
She adores the pouring rain falling down from the darkened grey skies
She feels herself being washed away with every breath she inhales
She’s beginning to loose her appetite
She does not understand why people pray to the dark skies
She doesn’t know why they ask for a reply from the Gods who created her
She wishes all the evil could be thrown away
She’s tired of complaining to the friends who don’t even have the time to ask why she has thoughts of suicide going through her mind
No matter how hard she tries she cannot think happy thoughts
She caresses her pale skin, dries away her sorrowful cries, and remembers all of her sins
She does not want to cry all throughout life
Wants to throw away all the pain she has gained
Put away all the negativity she received through her broken years, which seem like centuries
She wants to be pleased for eternity
Requests to be content without any more regrets
She still hears the thunder rolling and watches as the rain is still falling
As much as she admires the pouring
She is going to no longer be falling
She stands up straight and tall
Hoping to never fall
She screams out “THIS IS ME! STILL SHAMEFUL AND STILL NOT BEAUTIFUL!”
She still wonders why she is still alive
Wondering if her life is all overflowing with lies
She then walks back to the cottage down below
Glances at her handgun all loaded and ready to go
She walks up to a busted mirror
Stares right into her darkened gray eyes
Still thinking, “Why was I put into this life?”
Maybe she is not suppose to know the true meaning of life
She should not end it with the knife
She thinks should live her life without living dreadfully
Which she knows sometimes she cannot help it
But, should keep on eating, and not be anorexic or bulimic
She is through with being sick and tired
Tired of shattering the world in two
She turns around lifts up the handgun and knife
Walks over to the shattered window, then throws them into the wet soil
She no longer wants to be a disgrace
Wants to be able to show her unnatural face
Doesn’t want to be screamed at ever again
No longer wants to remain the same
She is going to change
Be for the better
Nobody will bring her done ever again
