Mirror

My parents NOW notice how little i eat
but i am not as bad about defeat
i eat more then i used to
but eating isn't something i like to do
when i eat lunch or breakfast i lose self esteem
i am angry and things don't look as they seem
i see a fat person looking back at me
and fat is something i don't want to be
my fat jiggles and my legs are stout
that jiggly fat i could live without
no matter what they tell me one meal a day
and it wont hurt me, despite what they say
for example today i ate two
and you have no idea what i went through
i feel bloated and fat and overweight
i must get my dads heavy traits
no matter what they say they can't change my mind
I'll spit out what they think i eat cause forcing me to eat isn't kind
I'm eating a bit and thats fine with me
just as long as i am not heavy
so let me eat as little as want
I'm not anorexic so don't even taunt
i used to be and i learned from it now
i can only eat one and yet somehow
i used 2 feel proud when i ate 2
know its to much pain to go through
so mirror I'm giving in
and i know it isn't a sin
but i don't want to be what i see
so eating few things is just fine with me

Lexi Lou

~people always yell at me for saying I'm fat because they think because i only weigh 90 somtin that makes me skinny but for my short body it doesn't at all! and i hate to eat! it makes me feel bad! I'm allergic to all food but eat it so i don't die!~