I was nothing

The thoughts of the past is like a vague dream.
I know it happened and true evidence shows
but my heart seems to hide everything.

I can't remember you, or the way you were.
I can't imagine you ever loving me.
I was so horrible and I still am.

I expect too much, or too little.
I don't even know who I am
nonetheless what I want.

I miss you, yes of course I do.
But it's not me to say if we are meant.
Or if you were just an obstacle I need to erase.

I know nothing of this,
but what I do know is that...
you were my everything.

While I was nothing.