The break up...

by David Ensor   Mar 10, 2008


That night the air grew colder
i had never seen her cry
she put her head on my shoulder
she couldn't look me in the eye

we sat in silence for hours
she didn't want to stay but she didn't want to go
with each tear she brought to the surface
things about me i didn't want to know

cant seem to dial that last number
even if i did i wouldn't know what to say
my head is full of the answers
to the questions i know she wont ask

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  • 16 years ago

    by Blissful

    I think you could add a lot more to this piece. More emotion and more imagery because I know you are capable of that. What you have now is fine but you can make it great. I could relate with the heartbreaking scene you created though.

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