On The Inside

Crying on the inside
Laughing on the outside
On the outside I'm happy
On the inside I'm slowly breaking down

On the inside I'm crumbling
Crumbling into two piles
One of what used to be
And the other of what is now

Maybe if I was stronger
I could handle everything
Only I'm not
And never will be

I am what I am
I am who I am
My destiny is slowly creeping upon me
Haunting me as I become someone else

Someone that I am not
Someone I hoped I'd never be
Recognizable by appearance to others
Unrecognizable by spirit by myself

I can't run from myself
I am no longer the same spirit I once was
It's been replaced
As if by magic I am someone I don't know

I can never be who I used to be
I am no longer who I was
By experience I have become someone
I hope to recognize

Right now it's unrecognizable to me
But I know one day I'll see
All this is leading up to
The adult who's wise like her mom and dad

This is all leading up to
The adult I'll one day become
Thanks to my parents
And the experiences I've gone through