If they tell you i'm dead...

If you wake up one morning
and they tell you I'm dead
don't look around in shock
you knew i was fcked in the head

if they tell you
i cut to deep this time
don't wonder how i could
it's not a crime

if they Tell you
my blood stained the floor
don't lock yourself up
slamming the door

if mum breaks down
if she starts to cry
don't join in her sadness
it was my choice to die

if mum tells you she love's me
and if you say it too
think before you do
now that my life is through

if mum asks for your help
there is a funeral to attend
for a broken girl
who's life you couldn't mend

if mum says she wants red rose's
of the fcking white one
tell her i want black rose's
and to be buried wit a gun

if she wants to dress me up
in the frilly pink dress she bought
get my used top and denim mini
in pink i wont be caught

if she cries at the alter
help her to her seat
her heart is now broken
will she ever find her feet

if they sing the fcking church songs
that never made sense to me
go get skillet, or my chemical romance
the real me they will all see

if they go on and on
about everything i used to be
tell em to get fcked
cause they never knew me

if they ask why i have scars
tell em i couldn't cope
let em know there is almost 200
cause i ran out of hope

if you dream of me
of what i did that night
don't worry you'll never know
cause you wont get it right

if you think about my death
you cut the fck out of yourself
you lock yourself up
it's not good for your health

if you wonder what went through my mind
as the blade went across
it was all of you my angel
and all of the loss

if you think you could have saved me
stopped me before i went to far
helped me on my feet
caught a falling star

if you say you still love me
know i love you too
and I'll always be in your heart
I'll always be wit you

if one day you remember my face
and it brings tears to your eyes
remember I'm still in your heart
and that will stop your cries