She never feels pretty

Her eyes are swollen
her cheeks bright red
from her crying, praying
and wishing she were dead
She never feels pretty
and has developed hate
for her face, body
and increasing weight
She feels guilt everytime
she starts binges or purges
she tries to control herself
but she cannot stop the urges
She screams and scratches
at her lack of self control
She wants to stop and become pretty
So she can become whole
She has lost all will
and has no more hate
she has become numb
as if it were her fate
She sheds no more tears of pain
she feels a great relief
She has given up all her hope
and with it all her grief

8.8.06