My heart has already set sail for the vanishing point
Sometimes the visions come in waves
Slow and painful
As they settle in beneath my skin
My heart begins to unfold untold memories
Other times they are strong and brutal
Hurtful
Making my breath quicken-
My body shake
Closing my mind
Sometimes I feel the presence of heavy hands on my pale skin
A stranger's body pressed against mine
-In force-
Sometimes I feel hands clasped around my wrists
Holding them still
Or pulling, pulling me towards somewhere I don't want to be
I wake up terrified
Alone-
I scream on the inside
But for some reason my throat closes like the diaphragm of the camera
(Allowing no more light in)
Except the image is all distorted
The photograph just doesn't seem right
I break down
Tears are slow down my cheeks
Burning hot
Releasing pain and desperation
Hate, blame, anger
There's too much of it to go around
But none of it makes it better
I ask myself why again and again
But no answer will ever resurface
There's no way to ignore, forget, disregard
A known fact
From your mind
Empty heart;
Hollow soul;
And nothing fits in place of all the nightmares
My heart has already set sail for the vanishing point
And I can't go back
