Unloved Lover

That brought back memories. I know exactly how it feels! Great write.

Damnit! its like its written about me, i'm him! haha.
I really relate =O
its a good peice. it describes the unconditional love given, the feeling of obligation and the need to return it, and trying so hard no understanding why you can't and then finaly having to give up and let go. it has a nice progression, nice ryhtm, and then repition is well used.
I liked it. its really good. nice job.

I liked this poem a lot, and I usually don't like love poems, they're either too lovey and about the perfect love or about the loss of it. Either of these are fine, as long as they're written well, which they rarely are.

Anyway, about your piece. I liked the stanzas, they flowed nicely and the rhymes were great. The way in which it was told was good too, a unique perspective, as far as I'm aware. The one thing I didn't like about this piece though was the line after two stanzas '...But he means nothing to you and you don't know why'. Although its obvious why it needs to be there, and clearly has to be said, I think it just didn't work. I feel it broke the rhythm of the piece. Maybe if it was done in a two line rhyming couplet or something. Anyway, good piece.

Brad

Wow, beautifully written! Every line was perfect and filled with emotion! Great work!

That was really great! I loved the way you did that with the one line being at the end of the stanzas. It was so well done, and the very last line, was perfect! Good rhymes and good flow. The third and fifth stanzas were my favorite!
Charisma*