I can feel the rage within me churn. It melts my consciousness with sheer resolve. It decides my thoughts...how fast the blood pumps through my veins. Being without someone you care for burns. It is burning my throat as I fight to keep from crying. My fear destines my dreams with dark intent...maliciously screening in my mind the never-ending possibilities that could occurr within only a couple of years. I wear my every day mask in silence within, because I can think of no other way to keep my sanity from blowing away in this bitter wind. My heart cries out like the wolves at hunt; together quarrying their prey. The snowflakes fall as they glisten brightly in the eyes of carnal instinct, the fire of anger burning like the desire to eat away a disease. I feel necessity when at night I awake stunned from my dreams. Most of the time they are filled with joyful memories. . .and still others are plagued with the injustice settled upon me. . .upon us. The misery is gone, only loneliness remains -- My bittersweet friend in this time of waiting. I hate the fact that I can control nothing of this time. I feel inept in my virtue of deciding what I feel, how to feel it, how to counteract my weaknesses. How do I grow when all my focus is upon the singular thing I most certainly love? How do I focus when I cannot sleep because of it? How do I dream when everything is in color, picturing the tears wrought down on our hearts; the vacancy of our touch. . .How do I whisper to her soul beside me when her ears are so far away? I care not about insidious designs that would flout my feelings or discretions. I feel nothing for the apathy of the ones who contained my years with false promises of happiness or brightness.
I will not be contained.
I am an energy unsurpassable except by those whose eyes have been open eternally.
I will never doubt my entrapment, though I decline to say that it was never intended.
My intentions are true. . .
My love is accurate.
That I cannot deny.
