See.... Here I am
Wanting to scream... wanting the power to stop it all
Desiring the words to make it all go away
The strength to make what is harmful naught
The wisdom to say to every heart what is needed to be heard
Inadequacy... unlearned science... unknown mysteries...
All a hurricane inside the white of my bones
The marrow stings with every failed attempt
... and the thought of every soul without --
Why does the wind scream at the fire
Tearing at it to consume the fragments of what is left?
Can the ash not be covered in water and survive?
If only the Rain could come and wash it all away
Drain sorrow's residue down these death-filled streets
Scorched bodies echoing their demise in my dreams
Mist covers the cobblestone trail amid broken vases and troubled horses
A cat screeches in the distance and I look at the midnight sky, alone in this dark alleyway...
Hands open, I want to cry, no tears will come, but my heart is breaking
The moon seems torn in half - to pour out the silver rays upon this holocaust
If I had been here... if I had listened... could I not have aided this one?
I ask myself as I see the vacant stare of a child limp against the ivy-covered wall
Alone I sink to my knees... the bells have stopped ringing and an eerie silence remains...
The tears pour forth
Sobbing, wanting solution, wanting Love
The shadows of the wall begin to touch my skin
The moon is further still in the sky...
Lost in the dawn I stay secluded in this way
Can my words be so meaningless
... Why can't the fire stop molesting
Why can't this paine stop burning!
Everything I knew is crumbled away
And everything else is falling afar
The sky begins to chase away the stars as the new day brings forth light
A glistening hand touches my shoulder and my tears are dried and disappeared...
I look behind me and there is no one there...
Sorrow surfaces again and I feel so alone...
All who need to hear what I have known is gone...
Or they refuse to listen
They curse what is good and right
They abuse the knowledge given unto them.
Lord, why can't they just understand?!
... I think of who I was... that I wouldn't listen...
Nothing could make me.
I had to get to a point where I would be willing to know and feel and learn.
Touch me, Lord.
Use me, Jesus... You worthy to pray to. You are worth my time; worth my everything.
Take me, God, the Anointed One and my Shelter.
Comfort me and teach me the words to say,
So that this dream may not come to pass.
Covered in your holy water I press on to thee
In Your embrace I wander
In the silence I hum Your sweet Name
And in the midst of death I remember your surrender.
Call unto me... give me strength to walk these streets
Singing your name, Jesus, my Everything...
Hell cannot pay for entrance to this mind
For the Rain has come to wash it away
And quench the burning pyres of flesh.
