If he only knew

I cant believe hes gone
I cant believe were through
and all i can think is
"if he only knew"

If he only knew the pain I'm in
if he had a heart at all
If he saw me cry every night
because he let me fall

How could we have been so hot
and now are just so cold
How could i have given up
the most perfect guy of all

I wish i didn't care
and that i could spit in his face
that i could just walk away
his memory forever erased

but i cant no matter how i try
it always feels the same
every day that passes
reminds me that, without him, i am going insane

without him i die
without him i don't even want to live
but i cant stop living
just in case one day he comes
and wants me to be his

It hurts to know
he just doesn't care
or maybe he doesn't know
how desperately i want to be with him there

I'm stuck in sorrow
its so thick i cant breathe
i want to call him
but its so hard to move
its so hard to live
its so hard to know we can never be