It has humungo potential. The content is all there, it just isnt set up very well. You have a structure, however with couplets each set should have a complete thought. Here they continue to the next set. Perhaps theyd be better with stanzas made of 4 lines? And a rhyme scheme (with couplets, or 4 lines) will help tie it together. Free verse is fine in most occasions, but there are times when it needs that extra something to pull it all together