I though the was was really good up until this part:

You should've put a gun beside my head
And pulled the trigger BAM!

^^ I think you tried to fit too many in the first line, and the last rhyme felt really forced. I think for the second line if you change "beside" to "to" it would flow just a little but better.

You poured your heart out in this short poem. I think you should have kept pouring, because it just ended wayy to fast. Haha, maybe try going into more detail about what exactly happened?

Anyways, great job, sweetie! :]

Keep writing!
Cayce

Oopss. *I thought that the [flow] was really good up until this part:

Don't typos suck?

Deep concept... well-written. This is a very good poem and I enjoyed it. The flow was good, the concept was great, and it made me think. I like that a lot about poems. 5/5

Wow good job. I understand how you feel and hopefully everything can start to go a lil more rite for you. good luck and this is really good 5/5

Oh hun... this is so sad. but you put it all into a wonderful poem! I think that you coulda kept on going, because it ended too soon. I wanted to read more, because this is what i'm going through *and many others* as well.. wonderful fantabulous poem here... you did great hun! keep ur chin up and keep on writing! :]

It's really good!.i like it!!!...keep it up!!!

Damn...i know how u feel...thanks for showing me a poem i can relate too, i appreciate it....great work 5/5...

Woa!

Great poem. Amazing feelings, so sad. 5/5

This one is really nice!! I love how you expressed your thoughts.. Especially with th 'BAM".. Nyahaha.. =]

This is really good.
the flow was great.
my fave part was BAM! lol.
i say that all the time.
haha.
but that was beside the point. lol.
well .5/5.

great job&&keep it up.
much love,
mac.<3
[.just.another.silly.teenage.girl.]

Omg this was awesome! I loved it...idk why but the BAM part made me laugh..but in a good way. I thought it was amazing because it gave off that sad, but funny feeling! Its was great!

I liked the thanks for showing me how dumb i am part.
Keep it up!
<3

UGh .. i CaN rElAtE .. BuT oN tHe BriGhT siDe iTs A wOnDeRfUl PoEm =]

UGh .. i CaN rElAtE .. BuT oN tHe BriGhT siDe iTs A wOnDeRfUl PoEm =]

Wow, this shows a lot of imagery. Even though it's depressing and short, it says a lot, me likey.
It's the year anniversary of this poem so I thought I comment and vote.
=] 5/5