To me, it ties together well and th e string in which each verse is attached beautifully is thin and breakable much like those, us, that can not accept blame for our own actions until the string is cut, and then we all much like shattered slippers, and build much like false grins.

Kay
This piece is full of deep and intense thoughts.

Only evident thing is Death
Born to die we face the test
Facing truths in final breath

These lines are so true. How many times do people wait till they are dieing to try to fix things they have messed up.

Helping hands slap mouths they feed
Mocking those in time of need
God forbid they live and breed

These lines make me so sad. Some people don't deserve to be parents. This is a excellent piece and really makes you stop and think.
Great job!
Love Cindy

Born to die we face the test...
this line really blew me away!
Such an intense poem by you Kay. It is really hard sometimes not to let life get to you isn't it?

Take care,

5/5 Ingrid

Great write. love your writing skills. 5/5

Hiya,
I really liked the way you structured your 'random thoughts'. Three rhyming lined stanzas.
I find the random thought some of the best ones. Well done 5/5
Michael

^Only evident thing is Death
Born to die we face the test
Facing truths in final breath^

This stanza is very powerful and thought provoking. The flow was good throughout the piece. The last stanza was a perfect endiing. Excellent job!

I could understand where you were going in this poem. Even though you said it was random thoughts. Good job,

Greta xx

It feels like a song to me, I am singing it in my head, for random thoughts I think it is rather good.

Only evident thing is Death
Born to die we face the test
Facing truths in final breath

This is my favorite stanza. Good work.

Wow! Certainly a very eye opening write, touching me in many ways. I am penned in the first stanza, a sinner in the second, appaulled in the third, taken in the fourth, Stunned by the fifth and ashamed in the sixth. A brilliant work and a joy to read.
Peace and Blessings

Even if its just random thoughts it is
the best well put together random thoughts
I have read in a long long time!

Kepp it up. Its great.

Congrats Kay....This is a wonderful piece. I'm so happy to see it won the weekly.
Love Cindy

To me they do make sence together, it is life isn't it?!?

Beautiful and thought provoking words. We should all take heed of them. Well done good work XX
Gail

I love this. it describes society very well, i believe. 5/5. excellent job.

Loved the poem, even though they may have been random thoughts, you def got your point across. A very honest poem.

Beautiful thoughts! the poem is amazing! that's the first poem I see that's thoughts are not "tied up" but still makes perfect sense to me. Great job!

Wow excellent choice of words and its a great poem

It was really random and deep and I think that's what really tried it all together. It was really good and I love it!

Nice to see you back writing again. This is such a dark stream of consciousness that is captivating in a very honest way. I've added this to my favorites.

God helps them those who help themselves to an extent much more that they can help others tooooo.... Wonderful thoughts and it should win..... any readers heart...