Winning Over a Stubborn Heart

It's not a twisted game, just an impossible task,
To give you my whole heart, when all you do is ask.
So I give you only half and you believe that it is whole,
This is my contrived illusion, my way to take control.

To the others it may seem like I am putty in your hand,
That I'm slipping through the cracks, weightless as the sand,
But look a little closer, just take an extra step to see,
The stone lying in your palm, it is lifeless, it is me.

Lessons I keep learning, but it's hard to follow through,
When learning is the easy part, it's the loving that is new.
So I'll retrace my footsteps, too find out who I used to be,
I'll release the lies I've locked up, the truth will be my key.

Now I know I can't keep screaming; running from my past,
As it blocks me from my future, holds me stiff, just like a cast.
I'm confronting all that's happened, before I permanently freeze,
And I'm here begging for your love, yes, I'm begging on my knees.

Emotions no longer hidden under my deceiving mask,
I'll give you my heart; you won't even have to ask.
For half just will not do, so my heart it will be whole,
This is your cue, your turn, your time to take control.

March 19, 2008