Wow, capatils in last line really work. well done great job hun xx

Ok for this poem it was deep and good but I felt as tho it could have been alil or mayb even alot longer.

I do not think that it flowed very well. But it seemed more like one of those poems we write to get the anger out or something. The emotion through out was definetly magnificent. Just try working on your lines a little better to make sure they flow right of the tounge as you read them. 5/5