by joanne Mar 27, 2008
category :
Sadness, depression /
other
I'm back again like a new person,didn't think i would make it this year,for what happend last year what you had could read in my other poems.my boyfriend cheated on me in november last year i still don't know why..we are living together but still i feel empy..i don't understand why he did that i was really good for him whatever he needed i gave it,me love my happines my sadness everything he had nothing to complain i don't want to praise myself up you know but i was good i never would have cheated i love him with all my heart still i do..but my feelings is not the same anymore what i had before..when i find out about that other girl,and and i saw here i think wasn't i beautiful enough was my love not good enough..what did she had what i didn't have..i felt so empty,lonely,like i kicked me so hard that i couldn't feel anything.i forgave him what he did i can see also changes and he feel very bad what he have done but still i blame him for what he did to me,he never will understand how i feel inside and still do.it's like i never will get out of this darkness i'm just waiting for the light to come and see clear again.sometimes i think maybe it's my fault what he did i was the bad person never i did blame him only mysef,now i know it was a mistake it's him to blame not me why me?? he took the step he went with her to sleep not me he wasn't drunk he wasn't on drugs he was 100% clear minded he did know very well what he was doing and what game he was playing.i'm glad i have a good entouition i knew everything and he thought i was stupid and didn't know nothing but i knew so who was smarter i was..!! i'm glad i find out now i just must go on with these stupid thoughts and pain still go on.... |