Can't give up .. can't let go

I scare myself when i look in the mirror and see your face through my eyes
it scares me when i feel your touch and your hands around my waste when I'm siting down all alone
when I'm sleeping in the middle of the night and i wake up sweaty because i had another dream about you
it scares me because i can't seem to let go of you
something has happened and i can't really explain it
you'd think I'm crazy but i keep thinking of you
whenever i go out , every song i hear , I'm always thinking of you and what could've been
i keep trying everyday to show you I'm still here
and that i care more than anyone ever will
and some days you see me and some days it's like I'm invisible to you
some days you send me home crying
and my makeups all smeared
while others you send me home with a smile on my face because i got to see you again and be held in your arms
i realize there's something i can't do i can't give up on you and i can't let go
i scare myself when I'm sitting all alone and i can see your face in my mind
when i look in the mirror and i see you smiling at me
i realize how much i love you and that this feeling will never go away
i wish the pain never existed but
this pain isn't going away