No Longer Can

You simply asked;
Why am i doing this to myself?
I purely answered,
" I no longer have to
Fake a smile on my face
Because it no longer can be there
I can no longer fight what i feel
No longer pretend that its unreal
But I don't want to end my life,
No longer want to push myself to death
Because thats running away from life
I can't seem to accept
Can't seem to understand
Or even withstand anything around me
I no longer want anything from this life
I just want to live it
The way I'm supposed to "