When I'm With You.

by Teria   Apr 5, 2008


When I'm With You.

It`s like octagons and roses that line a wall of doubt,
side to side they`re filled with pools and pools of _ :
what`s that word again?

It`s the emotion that I feel every time you`re near me,
The voice inside my head screaming, " love me, love me".
My emptiness is filled at the sound of your name -
Yet, I still can`t trust that this isn`t some kind of game.

You`ve got me holding on too tightly - I`m afraid to fall.
You`ve got emotions going on inside me - wishing you my all.
And, I still can`t figure out what your words are saying . . .
since you haven`t a clue the attention that I`m paying.

I feel a little bit obsessive, and as if I need professionals,
and I sometimes when I'm with you I can`t make any sense -
Now I`m at a loss for words on how you make me feel,
it`s like octagons and roses that line a wall of doubt.

And, side to side they`re filled with pools and pools of _:
what`s that word again? . . .
that summarizes all of this?

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittany C

    I like this one a lot. I can relate to it. I saw nothing that needed to be fixed. Everything was great. 5/5 Sorry that I don't have more to say.

  • 16 years ago

    by BluEyedMemory

    I loved the Flow of this poem. I really enjoyed the use of a question. I've tried that in some of my poem and I just cant get it to work. Great job with the expression of feeling I totally get every thing your saying with out even looking back and trying to think of what you meant to see.
    Great Write
    Emma 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Robert

    The expression in this poem was very well thought out and the flow was good I liked the way the flow went good job all and all Plot121

  • 16 years ago

    by Hollywood

    I really have not much to say every one already took it your really great and i hope there will be alot more to read!

  • 16 years ago

    by XxToWriteLoveOnHerWristxX

    This is a confusing piece.I notice that the missing word is obviously love, and the way you use it as a blank only leaving clues to what it could be. Like as you describe it as an emotion that you feel everytime he's around you and the roses and the octagon and the obsessions, brilliant 5/5 !props!

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