by Unamed Apr 10, 2008
category :
Sadness, depression /
about death
Gasping, gasping |
Beautiful! Loved it!!!!!!! |
by ReinaPuente
Aww... lovely...niice work 5/5 |
by Gizmo
Last stanza, is breath taking. |
Good poem 5/5 |
I think you could have used more descriptive words. Like the first few stanzas have the word "breath" in them a lot. Maybe you could find another way to describe it or another word for it. Also I thought there could be a little more emotion within this poem. And with the exception of a few spelling errors the rest was great. Great job, keep up the good work. |