I Am Sick

I'm sick of the windows; I'm sick of the light
The walls are closing in and
Yet there will always be room for the two of us
I've seen the same things over and over again
I'm done with watching the freed
I'm done with the cycle of living and dying
Because, every year, you ignore it completely
And think that I'll live forever

I want to speak without caution or strain
But I know it's too late, for
I've led my mind to a stray wood
Where I shut it up with no fear of your angst
Now it's hiding in an attic and I'm too scared
To go up and see myself thinking
You've stolen enough from me
I'm sick of not knowing my thoughts

I won't let you get to me, I'm stronger than you
I know your weakness:
I am so pure you can't even taste me
If only you'd stop trying to ruin me
It is the room that is dirty
It is you that will never be clean
It is the world outside of these windows
That you will never be a part of

I know that I'm not getting out of here
I know everything in this room
I know too much now
I am sick of knowing you and
Not knowing me at all
Nothing is a mirror, so I know that I'm alone
Nothing is my friend, you are jealous of her...
I know

I should have been warned of your kind
I'm sick of regretting what could have been
If I lie to myself, I'll think you're the only one
But then it's the truth that I crave to know
She is my friend; her real name is Nothing
I'm not sick of Nothing, I like her too much
She is so healthy I cannot believe it
She is shutting me down like a perfect disease