He sat rocking, slowly back and forth
Hands a little shaky now, not like his youth
Back then they were steady and strong.
They had built this house
^^^
The imagery in this opening stanza is so clear. I can see the image of an elderly man rocking to and fro.

He knew that one day soon
He'd close his eyes and be taken home
In his sleep, he supposed
Didn't much care anyway
^^^
This part is so sad ... An image is created in my mind of the elderly mad, still in his rocker staring into the skies wondering when he will be taken home ....

Granddad, you old sleepy head!
Get up, we need to play today
A smile touched his lips, a side glance to heaven.
Maybe just a day or two more Lord.
^^^
This ending is wonderful ...
How the smile of a child or the ones we love can lift our spirits. When all our hopes are gone and we think we are ready to go home ... we push onwards for just one more day with our loved ones .... A beautiful, touching ending.

My first try at a non-rhyming poem.
^^^
Deana you have done a wonderful job!
You have woven a piece that jumped right inside my heart and touched my soul.
Excellent !
Luanne

This is awesome. I was there somewhere in the picture for sure as i felt this all happening right in front of my eyes. And i smiled in the end too.
Loved it
Great write

all the best and take care

Deana,

You painted a very vivid and loving picture here.
How we wish our parents and grandparents could stay with us forever...but one day we all have to leave.
I love your choice of words:)

Hugs,

Ingrid

Beautiful Deana.....I believe it captures a perfect snapshot of old/ vs young.....excellent imagery....I can picture the old country homestead and the grandpa...reminds me of WV....lol

"Granddad, you old sleepy head!
Get up, we need to play today
A smile touched his lips, a side glance to heaven.
Maybe just a day or two more Lord."

^beautiful ending. Love the inspiration in this piece....great job!

Growing old is never an easy thing, watching life pass us by hoping that the ones we love remember us. This was a beautiful piece from you, such a heartfelt read that reminded me of my grand parents.. wonderful job!!

Deana
You did a wonderful job on this poem. Growing old and being alone a fear I think many have.

"Granddad, you old sleepy head!
Get up, we need to play today
A smile touched his lips, a side glance to heaven.
Maybe just a day or two more Lord."

Grandchildren can be the best medicine. They give so much uncondtional love. They light the day when they are around.
I love the last line.
Good job!
Take care Cindy

This is just sooooooooo great!!!!!!!! It got me a tear or 2, maybe 3 or 4.but it was sooooo very good.....You did a wonderful job on this...I cant say enough.you touched my heart and i'm glad..Great work!!!!!5/5......xoxoxo

This is a very beautiful piece of work. So true, of bonds that tie one down, no matter how old.

very well done.

shobhana

Deana
Congrats on the win :)
Excellent piece and well deserved.

Congrats on winning the weekly contest!

~BRAVO~ Well done!!!!!

A beautifully penned reflective free verse. Gives the reader a sense of mixed emotions. Good flow and storyline.

^He knew that one day soon
He'd close his eyes and be taken home
In his sleep, he supposed
Didn't much care anyway^

A sad stanza. I see these emotions conveyed by many elderly patients I take care of. They are old and tired and don't want to be a burdon. A very realistic portrayal.

^Granddad, you old sleepy head!
Get up, we need to play today
A smile touched his lips, a side glance to heaven.
Maybe just a day or two more Lord.^

Now this is a great happy ending. His little half pint has given him a reason to hang on just a bit longer. I also see the happiness that visits from the grandchildren and great grand hildren bring to a tired soul.
Excellent job on this well deserved win!!!!!!

Congrats on your win Deana ... a well deserved win my friend!

That is an awsome poem. usually I gravitate towards the rhyming ones, but this one kept me hooked. Its a great poem. And congrats on spreading your wings into new types of poetry. You did VERY well. 5/5 deffinetly.

I just lost my Grandad, who was also a Great Grandad. This really touched me. And while I often comment, I never vote. But you're getting a vote. Very little poetry on here moves me like this did.

Thank you.

Wow!!..great job!!!..lots of emotion, it was nice!1..i can see why this poem won!!..great job!
Aly

That is THE most inpriational poem ive read