Yet another awesome poem =] great job

Good job...

Maybe some bigger words, or change them around or add some small ones to give it a little rhythm. some of the rhymes seem to be a little bit forced. i obviously wouldnt really know, but i like to start a poem with only a broad subject in mind. perhaps i would like it to be a love poem, or an angry poem, or a sad one. i let the feelings take over, and i write what they say to me, but i try to make them seem real. sometimes i fail horribly, but that's gonna happen. and the last part i think should be "how CAN i say i do" instead of using could. grammar can be confusing, but it impresses us nerds when you use it goodly :P