I love this title . Oh boy . I love it . I love it . Lala . So here goes the second one . Lol . . .

First : Aww . I must say the first stanza was a great hook in -- You got my attention by describing the actual event and it was heartbreaking for me . Wow . I love it . And your flow is strong and smooth .

Second : Honestly , I am so suprised that your flow is still going so smoothly . Wow and it gets more sad as the poem goes on . Oh goodness dear -- I love the storyline and the way you describe it . I am guessing this is a situation you or someone close to you because you write well about it . Great stanza :]]

Third : Well it ' s not really a stanza , but you get the point . I like it as a transition . It ' s strong and really made me think about what is happening . Also , your word choice is amazing .

Fourth : I feel so sad , this stanza is beautiful yet heartbreaking . oh man . I can just picture this event . Sighs . There are a few places where your words could of been flipped around but I won ' t pick anything out .

Fifth : Another beautiful stanza . Geeze . I really have no complaints except you say promise them things . I don ' t like the them . It bothers me . But the last line is amazing . Amazing stanza dear .

Last : I do not think there is one flaw in this stanza . I love it . You summed the piece up beautifully . I loved it all . Gosh . So overall , great job hun . 5 . 5

Amber .