No Hope for Pawns

by EclipsesChick   Apr 18, 2008


Carry me no more on words of
false encouragement. Continue with
your entourage and leave me to
reckless abandonment.

Tell me lies no longer that you
used to make my life brighter.
Just set me here upon my grave
and make your burden lighter.

Do not convince yourself to come
back for me when you know I am
already gone. This was a chance,
not a choice, predestined to be a pawn.

I will lay myself no longer in your
hands to give me some relief. You
chose this for your own when no
one would believe.

We will see each other no more in
a stare or passing glance. We have
walked this road too many times
for us to take the chance.

So here I stand, as do you,
upon our broken lives. May
you send me now on my way
as I take the final dive.

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by EclipsesChick

    Thanx!

  • 16 years ago

    by Jim McMillen the man within

    This is a well written poem I liked it very much so go with the flow and keep it up / But on the downside: you might try this
    Carry me no more
    on words of false encouragement
    continue with your entourage
    and leave me to reckless abandonment
    --------
    on verse 4 after / some relief drop you choose down to the next line
    ---
    verse5
    after passing glance drop we have down one line
    --- verse 6
    after broken lives , drop may you , down one line /
    but then again i'm just a pair of eyes that still type with two fingers trying to share
    my O C D
    good poem keep it up

  • 16 years ago

    by James Alexander

    Wow. I really like it!

    The only thing I noticed...

    Do not convince yourself to come
    back for me when you know I am
    already gone. This was a chance,
    not a choice, predestined for a pawn.

    If in that verse you changed...
    "predestined for a pawn" "predestined to be a pawn" it'd flow much much better...
    I hope you don't take that as a negative, or that I'm trying to correct you, just some helpful advice...
    ~Superman

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