by East Poetry
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Hi Randy |
by Amy
Randy, great poem!! That was really good...and yes very trippy!! I really liked it though!! Wonderful job!! I can't wait to read more of your poems!! Please, keep them coming! |
That was an amazing poem. It is a very difficult thing to understand and describe, nothing is..but I think you captured it real well |
its niceto see someone on the same wavelength as me. |
by East Poetry
lol thats cool Mcdave, thx |
by BaybeBlew
Wow i loved it...i've never been able to write about something like that...really awesome...your poems are always awesome to read...i hope you'll post some more. |
by David
This pulled me in. I love the flow and enjoyed the rhymes. |
by Michelle
great Randy....loved it mostly because it was so flipping unique!!!! wonderful to read poems that are different and this was great!! take care, Michelle :) |
by Danielle
wow...i loved it, i had definitely never read anything like that before...so justg great job...major props to you...keep it up...it made me feel like there wasn't any life...nice poem |
by Sean Allen
Interesting Randy. As is characteristic of all my comments, I will attempt to limit the accolades I give to the poet or poem (which doesn't mean that I don't appreciate your writing, I think it is great!) Okay that is enough of that. Down to the nitty-gritty. There were times in your poem when I felt the rhythm get thrown off, especially when there were many comma breaks, or during long lines filled with many syllables. Not all poems need to have perfect rhythm however, and so that did not weigh too heavily upon my mind. There were a few grammatical errors that I will point out now. I think the word you wanted on in the last stanza is not 'affect' but rather 'effect'. It is a terribly hard difference to notice, but I am pretty sure you want the word' effect'. In the second to the last stanza, you write 'its', and it should be 'it's' because it is a contraction. Good work Randy. |
I will attemp this later definatley and let you know, cos all i can think about right now is how great your work is. |
by Desert Rose
that was really good |
by Leah20
I liked it, very, very original and creative. You convey your message very well, Keep it up! |
Left me with a feeling of emptiness, yet wholeness at the same time. Weird way of expression, yet the truth. |
I like this poem very much and it really is about nothing |
by Em
This piece is very unique, really enjoyed it. 5/5, Em |
I really like this piece because when you sit and think of just pure nothingness it makes it impossible to feel bad about how little any of us might have in life right now. Sometimes its difficult to watch people who have the whole world and all the money in it.... but atleast we have something and not the complete opposite. Nice job 5/5 |
by L
I experience or I went through this when I was five... seriously, I ask my mom. But she didn't have an answer other than we are the work of god. |
by Mello193
This was beyond clever. exactly the same philosophy of the hollows Devinne. great poem and it did take me on a mind trip. nicely done! |