Now THIS is more like it!

I sensed raw, deep emotions in this. I literally wanted to read more of it. It was simple, wasn't forced.

ONE thing needs fixing:
2nd stanza, 3rd line:

"To be everybodies burden"

^^change -everybodies- to "everyone's" it sounds, looks, and flows much better with the piece.

Overall, this was fantastic.
5/5
~Lace

I am still amazed by this poem, with or without the edit.
I love the ... effect at the end. It sort of fades out the ending of the poem.
=) Fantastic

I love this poem. i can feel your pain, as you wrote it, of loosing her.