I sit here and i listen to the horrible fights.
i hear screaming and shoving and words of all types.
and think to myself. "is it ever gonna end"?
just one sip of a poison drink,
just one sound of a silent slap,
just one holler of heartbreaking horror
leading me to believe that once it starts.. its never gonna end.
all of this pain that Ive acquired over the years just keeps building up and its killing me inside. the endless nights filled with hatred and fatigue just don't seem to matter anymore. when i wake up in the morning i tell myself "it was all a dream...it never really happened"
but then i glance down at my swollen and bruised body as a symbol of reality. i cry and i cry hoping that it was the last time that i would have to go through that pain.. physically and mentally. its hard you know, living life like this. but as usual, i just paint on a smiling face and go on living my day. trying to forget everything that i know i cant!
until tomorrow, maybe just maybe..i will awaken from this nightmare and i will look at my arms and legs and see nothing but the soft skin that has never been touched. maybe :*(
