No happiness

by Brandon Lee   Apr 25, 2008


You stabbed my heart left me to bleed.
You show no mercy while on my knees.
I had hoped you one I could trust and depend.
Yet you gave me wounds that refuse to mend.
Your merciless acts leave me broken and worn.
My days are darken by a never ending storm.
Words of wisdom I can no longer here.
Like salt in wounds they begin to seer.
With a stabbed heart my lifes joy bleeds out.
Could this have been avoided, thats something I doubt.
The only option is it was fate, something I ignorantly denied until now.
Money truly can not buy happiness, that Ive come to know well.

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Teria

    "Words of wisdom I can no longer here."
    [Words of wisdom I can no longer HEAR]

    "With a stabbed heart my lifes joy bleeds out."
    [With a stabbed heart, my life's joy bleeds out]

    Take to note, there's a comma and life = life's (you own it).

    "Could this have been avoided, thats something I doubt."
    [Could this have been avoided? That's something I dbout]

    NOTE: Two sentences. Thats = THAT IS = That's

    "The only option is it was fate, something I ignorantly denied until now."
    [ The only option is fate, something I ignorantly denied until now]

    "Money truly can not buy happiness, that Ive come to know well."
    [Money truly CANNOT buy happiness, that I'VE come to know TOO well]

    Overall you have a good poem. It has a great meaning to it. You've distrubted the emotion quite well throughout it and written it well as well. You've also done a magnificant job on the flow (othe than the ending)- once you fix the ending it will be a GREAT poem

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