Torn

The first stanza caught me off gaurd, it's really good. I like how you're using the same rhyme at the end of each sentence. However in the line 'Turning for a moments breath to look into your eyes' moments should have an apostrophe s at the end to show ownership. Sorry if I'm bugging you about these things, but to me a poem is never complete without correct grammar and puctuation. It's like the frame of a poem. You wouldn't want to put a pretty picture in a horrible frame right? Same thing here. A bad frame distracts from the pretty picture.

That pain follows my hopes flight, as such has been for years

hope's flight* Ownership thing again.

This poem is kick ass. The vocabulary you used was great and the rhyming was just fine. You stuck to your theme of having the same rhyme for each stanza, and the metaphors got the point across. Good job.

Narrow minded fool of love, enduring through the tries
Common misconceptions of a broader scale of lies
Broken pieces left to death, impassioned heart defies
Turning for a moments breath to look into your eyes

*Wow.. I love how you started this. very detaled and full of imagery. great!*

I spoke my heart long ago but pleas fell on deaf ears
I felt it hard to let go; in wake I left my tears
Hopes renew with dawns pale light, though rise reluctant fears
That pain follows my hopes flight, as such has been for years

*another perfect stanza, eveything is well written and makes me feel what your feeling*

Panic curbs the faith I lack; the words can just not form
From speechlessness you turn back, again I'm left to mourn
Meager action so mundane in light of my forlorn
Though hurt, I can't refrain from that which I am torn

* this was perfect in every way. everything was equally strong. keep it up. Shanik*

Btw. my favorite stanza must be the last ...because it ends smoothly and perfect...the flow and the way the words are, just utterly amazing. keeping writing

I absolutely love your style ov writing. truly lovely. 5/5

This is my favorite, each line written like a master.