My last second

When did these scars imprint upon my body?
I am suddenly a lost cause, an invisible bystander
Silently dragging my feet through life, not really caring
Just waiting for the last tick of the clock
For my last second, until I drop

When did it become so hard to breathe?
I am suddenly choking, please just get away from me
Quickly running away from life, trying not to care
But I am so scared
And I sit here counting the cracks on the sidewalk
Every little block of cement that adds up to one
Every flower, every blade of grass around me
What will I see when everything goes dark?
Will I still hear your hurtful words?
Or will it all fade away
In my last second, will I long to stay?
Or just smile knowing everything will soon be okay
As I am carried into my casket
And my soul rises up and away
To whatever is in those clouds that made me feel so gray
And so hard to breath
What will become of me?
Because I've already begun to waste