My Knife and Life

My nightmare is a dream called life. I could easily end this nightmare with a butcher knife.
I can't bring myself to do it, but I think of it every night.
" How can I end my life with only a simple knife?" I ask myself.
Over and over again, I say this every night. I scare myself sometimes,this gives my soul a fright.
What do you think I should do?
Should I loose my life to this retched knife?Or should I continue this life ,instead of of paying the ultimate price.
I'm scared to end my life.But so frighted to live this nightmare of a life.