Comments : You Go To My Head.

  • 16 years ago

    by Sweet Disposition

    I love the meaning in your poems.

  • 16 years ago

    by TheRevelation

    "Our rugged feet leave behind a trail of false lies and misheard truths, with the occasional broken heart. We floated through the world like liars on the television screens and we took what they chose to give, which wasn't much."
    -I love how you said like liars on television screens because not everything heard on tv is real. The opening sentence of the poem was perfect for an opening. The feet seem tired so they drag and leaving behind lies and misheard truths was a great saying.
    "Your face dares to hold the most beautiful lines of confusion and your hand allows itself to be colored a dark color of distress. [Didn't you ever consider that you held my hand too tight?] But I tugged away dear, and somehow, someway, our roles reversed. I am now your broken heart.
    And like a night full of innocence, my screams echo off these shore less oceans. Echoing between worlds of dreams and reality, punishing me with the deepest of silences and a world of nothing, a nothing that you decided to give."
    --A face full of confusion, I like the line-nods- but the hand, the person doesn't want to let go, keeps holding on but you break away. Shoreless oceans was a lovely, beautiful line.
    -"The television screen offers just a little too much sympathy as the images float across my eyelids and play across my tormented face. I need you. But you aren't and weren't there, just like those midnight lovers.
    So as the television is clicked on tonight and I reunite with the truth which prefers to be hid - Remember one thing... you go to my head."
    The ending was wonderful, summed it up perfectly. The television images go across a tormented face sets the tone of the person. It seems like the person wanted space, wanted the truth but only saw lies and everything went to her head like all emotions do. They travel from the heart and up to where it is unsafe to think about them.
    5/5!

  • 16 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    I like this piece a lot, it is descriptive, very refreshing and original. I think that you expressed your emotions excellently through this piece.

    Your choice of words is great from the beginning to the end and you portrayed truly creative imagery. Also, the whole piece posses very captivating atmosphere.

    I like how you incorporated the title into the poem, it's effective as the ending of the piece.

    - Your face dares to hold the most beautiful lines of confusion and your hand allows itself to be colored a dark color of distress.-'
    ^^^
    I fell in love with this. Brilliant, truly excellently written.

    Overall, 5/5 from me.