Here it comes

Late one night.... nearly two years past, her last encounter
she sits alone....behind closed doors... begging herself not to do this again.

She's crying... unsure why. There's something sharp in her hand...
Don't do it... you swore you wouldn't do it again... what will he say if he finds out... stop it.

Too late, one line appears then another, before she can continue she's interrupted with a goodnight from her family. She moves to her room.... and here she sits thinking what have i done... still crying, and wanting one person and one alone to be there...

She's scared of what's going to happen when she sees him... last time he yelled at her... but she knows she'll be withdrawn when she sees him again, and he'll pick up on it.

Although all this is running through her head she's still thinking this isn't over there's some pain there now, but she still believes she needs to do more than this....

She doesn't want anyone to know.... as much as she needs to tell him she hasn't seen him in months, and he doesn't reply to her texts now.... not because he doesn't care... maybe just maybe he's trying to help her move on.... believe me she's well past it now.

So here this girl sits... crying for no reason... ready to pull out another sharp thing and add to her collection.

**this is all true, and yes its about me.**