Comments : To You...

  • 16 years ago

    by Shotput Girl

    Not one of ur best but, good none of the less.

    ~love~

  • 16 years ago

    by Spoken Silence

    I like this poem, its simple and sweet. Your rhyme scheme here is very good.

    "You've got the style
    The sweetest grace
    You've got the figure
    Most beautiful face"

    This sounds very sweet, this stanza reminds me of a rap, sorta lol. I like your rhyme scheme of ABAB even if its simple it fits the poem very well.

    "You keep me running
    In the eternal race"

    I like how you use "Race" in reference to life, in my opinion anyways, its different and its good I like this.

    ''You've got the beauty
    That life wont erase
    You've got my heart
    That you can embrace"

    I like this ending. its cute, its sweet, its everything that this poem would need. I loved it, it was fun to read and it really did bring a smile to my face, when I was actually feeling sad right now, which was a good thing. Great write I loved it. Keep up the good work! You should check out some of my poetry sometime ;)