Death, My Love, Please Visit Me

by Faithless Watermelon   May 4, 2008


As I lose my sight,
I lose my will to fight,
I lose what they say is right,
And I ask, "What happened to my might?"

I'm dead
I'm dying,
Lying,
World untying..

It's beginning to rust;
This chain,
In the rain,
Keeping me so sane..

It's beginning to bust;
This tether,
In this weather,
Holding me from the nether..

Where have you gone, my love?
I love such cold hands,
Pulling on those strands,
Hiding me from the sands

PLEASE!
Stop shrieking,
Reaking,
Leaking..

Somebody save me,
Somebody save me,
Somebody hold me,
Somebody take me..

My love,
Find me with your embrace,
Take me without disgrace,
I long to leave this war-torn place

Please, God, make it stop, I can't take it anymore. It hurts so badly, please make it stop. I don't want it anymore, please take it away. There is no lapse in pain, no reprieve, no sign of light. The interminable searing of my heart and soul.. My body feels it as well.
The unrest
Hurt in my chest,
Fought with the best,
The unrest..

My love, why don't you visit me forever?

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Beautiful Chaos

    Rhyme is good, but you must hone the skill, some of it just does not seem to fit.

    Somebody save me,
    Somebody save me,
    Somebody hold me,
    Somebody take me..

    This just has too many "somebody's" in it. I didn't even read them all I would change this part to read:

    Somebody save me,
    Hold me,
    Take me..

    In the end of this write and your last I read, you seem to let go and it works wonders, you just need to apply that to all of your writing and realize they don't always have to have a rhyme scheme, bn ut if they do, it must flow.

  • 16 years ago

    by madlyinlove

    Wow this is a really good poem...definetly write more poems.

  • 16 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    This is amzing work, write more!! xx

  • 16 years ago

    by Sungrl And Mrs Whatsit

    Really well-done...

    And, in response, I must say:...The Truth is, death is, indeed, inevitable...The Real question is...What are we going to Do with our lives while we wait?...We absolutely Will die....Can we truly, courageously, and meaningfully, Live?

  • 16 years ago

    by Andrew

    Wow love your poem, like the way you potray your emotions. Your poem flows very well, like the rhymes too. Well thought of and nicely penned. Keep up

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