Students vs. Teachers

by Pink Romance   May 5, 2008


Setting in class listening to random
conversations, getting in
saying something
humiliating.

Teachers talking and student
making fun of her on things
she has already said.
I just don't get a word she is saying.

Students listening to ipods
and other electronic devises.
giggling about something that happen
during lunch time.

Security walks in and collects all the
pleasant electronics, aha!
the teachers happy cause now all the
students have to pay attention.

The bell rings and everybody is rushing,
students pushing and shoving.
to get out the front door, the crowds becomes
bigger and annoyed.

You know i wondered what we learned that period?
probably to be more cautious.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Narphangu

    Watch your grammar. ...Punctuation, spelling, capitalization. Those are the biggies to consider when writing on any poetry/prose site.
    If you need help figuring out how to do any of this, there are tons of people here, and I'm sure there'd always be one who'd help you. Myself included.

    I really liked your ending; it was VERY funny! You've definitely gotten the spirit of teenagers down pat.
    Play around with your "white space," or line arrangement, to emphasize the funny parts and words that hold the most meaning. One key part of this is remembering to always end a line with an important word(i.e., no it, and, but, is, etc.) and try to break it up the way you want it to be read. This means that any places where you want there to be a pause warrents a comma. Longer pauses get a dash or a period, then a line break, or a new stanza.
    You have most of the arrangement down... I'm not sure if you tried or not. Just take another look at it and apply some of the above concepts and it'll be much better!

    Hope this helps!

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