Can you hear her screaming?
The pain stricken shrieks.
Can you see her crying?
The catastrophic drops she weeps.

[ This was a perfect opening. It was full of pain and right away you know this poem is going to be intense. And I love how you perferred to the tears as catastrophic drops.. gave me goose bumps =) ]

Can you see him smirking?
The wicked grin spread across his lips.
Can you see his enjoyment?
The pleasure rank withing his eyes.

[ Actually, I got shivers from this one. You can just picture some horrible man getting pleasure from another person's pain. It is just a bitter taste of reality. The vocabulary you used here was very nice. ]

Can you see them?
The "Perfect" couple.
Can you see past the lies?
The ones spun on outer appearance.

[ Once again, another bitter taste of reality. Many couples we all think are perfect usually have this dark side that none of us know about. We all have our problems, no matter how perfect things may seem, and you definitely were able to point that out here. ]

Take a closer look.
You will see how imperfect they are.
He indulges himself on another
and she dies a thousand times over
hoping maybe this time he'll truly love HER.

[ A perfect little ending for such a sad poem. It makes you feel really bad for the girl.. but then again, you're clinging onto it, wanting to know more. What happened to the couple? Questions like that are just spinning around in your head after reading this piece. ]

Great job, Elaine. You really outdid yourself and it wasn't even very long. Whether it's a million pages or a few sentences, you never cease to amaze me. Love ya. 5/5 <3 <3 <3 <3

~Kayla~

=O
I'm actually speechless.

The rhetorical questions make this piece.

As I read this poem, I got a strange sence of sadness and anger at the same time.

Wow Elly, You do no how to invoke emotion in a reader don't you!

Truely magnificant, very well done.

Love and hugs.
Kat xxx

Yet another incredible piece. It starts out perfectly and as Kayla says, you know it will be intense. It's so emotional that you can easily get caught up in it, and you actually experiance the emotions. The wording was absolutly perfect, flawless. A definate 5/5, as always. Nice title by the way.
Keep writing,
Rado

Once again very relatable and understanding. We put in 1000% of our hearts andl ove and we never fully get the same thing in return and we always end up paying for it in the ned :( Amazing job once again 5/5 GG23

Once again . Really strong emotions .. Awe .. You're making me think of my ex . I really can't say anything bad about this , it's incredible . So many true feelings put into it .. Just once again 5/5