Closer to a door

I feel obsessed
like I'm obvious
you're possessed
almost oblivious

i look at you
to be comforted
but to take you
would be distorted

why can't i be wanted
why can't i be warm
why am i haunted
afraid I'm causing harm

every time your name is spoken
my heart races
even though i know you're taken
in other places

but you smile better than before
my heart beats faster
i feel closer to a door
what's behind it-disaster

you make me feel tainted
wanting your affection
on me painted
because I'm sure it's perfection